What Advice Would You Wish to Share with a 20 yrs Old Self That Would Make a Massive Impact Upon Your Life?
If there is something I could share with my 20 years old self now, it is to go and fail.
Wait, what? Yes, what I failed at today is a question I would like to ask myself daily from a very early stage. I will explain why…
I am not talking here about failing at something I already know and still keep doing despite knowing that it does not serve me anymore (falling back is a different matter I also touched previously in another post) But something I have not done before and feel from within that is my next step on the way to the desired place to be. I am talking about taking necessary action steps after deciding to change the course of life and dive into the full potential.
This path is always meant to explore the unknown on the way to see what else is possible. For me it is very liberating and empowering way at the same time!
If This Is So Rewarding, Where Does This Fear Component Come from?
The answer is in the mind. Because it is “new”, hence is out of our comfort zone.
But what happened to this openness and curiosity about life from our childhood?
Just watch a baby. How many times did it fail at first in order to stand up? There is some driving force behind pushing the baby to keep moving forward, despite so many failures. There is no fear of failing there, otherwise it would not do it.
You do not remember that, do you? Studies show that the earliest memories start from the age of 2 and half.
Maybe there is something here telling us how to encounter obstacles on the way.
Maybe remembering failures is an issue here, when we slowly become enslaved by our past?
We definitely still have that “baby” ability within, but we lose this genuine connection every time we perceive what is in front of us from past experiences. There is an old program operating in our system, installed when we were still very young to protect us (after we learnt walking). It creates a circle of comfort within where we can feel safe. That comfort is linked to the egoic mind and its preferences. We have been operating far too long on it with consequences.
We become fearful to leave that comfort and be exposed to discomfort. As a result we stop really living and evolving.
And still even after knowing that, it is hard to let go of that, right?
Every Decision Matters
We have decided to follow a very conditioned approach in life. Looking through the mind lenses of what feels good and bad. Failure is not associated in the mind as something good as it brings disappointment and feelings of sadness, anger, frustration etc. Hence we learn to avoid that at all costs.
Now with that belief in order to do something and to avoid disappointment, we wait for the perfect moment. So we postpone our actions for days, weeks, years, maybe even forever…
Creating a story that being successful means there is no place for failures, only wins with no looses is a biggest mistake. This itself creates enormous pressure inside the mind. But also a fear of what happens if I do not succeed? And then after the loss, a disappointment arrives as expectations have not been made. Not only ours, but also those around: family and friends.
Nobody wants to be disappointed. I get that. But maybe the issue lies in the expectations?
How about giving yourself permission to have a go and then learn from every challenge? They will certainly come your way, plenty of them despite whether you like it or not!
Would that not be better if we change that expectations into appreciation for what in front of us?
There Is No Fear, Only Life Abundance!
The “new” is the way that best describes nature. Every moment is a new moment. They are captured in the mind as the same but in fact what is happening right now, has never happened before.
What if, being uncomfortable is a natural state of being aligned with life and its unknown nature. Maybe feeling discomfort should be a great sign that we choose right way?
Why are we so much attached to our past experiences and build stories around our beliefs? Only to become fearful of losing it. Oh no, imagine what would happen then?
Or even better, how about instead of imaging, challenge that belief?
With openness and curiosity, who knows you might find it even a joyful discovery.
Well, there is only one way - to check this out!
Go and Fail
It is funny how much this is changing the course of approaching new challenges. So give yourself permission to fail on your way. Fear will become abstract once you discover what awaits you on another side.
Like with a baby we all were once, willingness to experience will keep you moving forward - not thinking and calculating.
And learn from both - wins and loses.
Do not wait for the perfect moment. They do not exist so will never come.
Act now, take those uncomfortable steps knowing that your greatness depends on it!
All successful people on this planet will tell you that they failed countless times. Their success came from a path of failures.
What is in the way becomes a way - to your Freedom!
Happy Discoveries!!!